Cry before every gym class? Walk into doorways? Fall up the stairs? Let’s talk…

By Cady M. Stanton, M.S. · Facilitate Joy! 

This morning I went outside to feed the feral cats, and on the way back my ankle  tipped sideways and I hit the ground hard. My coffee cup flew out of my hand and  smashed in the middle of the alley. Cat food cans went everywhere.  

I’d also fallen a few days earlier, but today took me out and I ended up at urgent care in  a brace with a sprained ankle. While I was there, the doctor pointed out an old break on  my x-ray where part of the bone had never healed. I wasn’t surprised. I’ve been falling my whole life. 

At 4, I fell off the jungle gym, breaking my arm on the way down. My mom said she  could hear me screaming a block away.  

At 10, I twisted my ankle running for a ball on the playground. In middle school, a kid stampeded over my foot running from a fight. Both led to ER visits, casts, and hobbling around on crutches.

I had multiple  bike accidents, including going over the handlebars and ending up hospitalized.

I slipped on wet leaves and hit the back of my head. I slipped on rocks at the beach and ended up with a gash that bled for three  months.

I caught the heel of my dress shoe inside my own pants leg and fell up the stairs  at a theater. 

I was always mad at myself for being clumsy and awkward.

It wasn’t until my 30s and 40s that I started to understand the falling was due to a cluster of physical  conditions that frequently co-occur with autism:

DYSPRAXIA 

Essentially executive dysfunction of the body. My muscles don’t sequence movements in  a coordinated way, so everyday motion turns into my body crashing into itself. Or the pavement. 

HYPERMOBILITY DUE TO ISSUES WITH MY CONNECTIVE TISSUE 

My ligaments and tendons are extra stretchy, so my joints move more than they should (think of one of those Halloween skeletons). It also means my blood vessels don’t contract properly, which contributes to blood pressure problems. 

DYSAUTONOMIA 

Dysfunction of the autonomic nervous system. I get dizzy easily, my heart rate jumps to 130 from standing up or eating pasta, and my blood pressure has swung from  dangerously low to a high of 240/180. I’ve been in the ER twice this year for blood  pressure spikes and chest pain. 

As an anxious little girl who cried before every PE class, I wish I’d known that kids who move differently can become more comfortable in their bodies:

• Occupational  therapy and physical therapy can make a real difference functionally.

  
  

• Movement options that are individual and require less coordination can make physical activity accessible without the added social pressure of team sports.

  
  

• Movement needs to be sustainable. Running was a huge and important part of my life for years, but hypermobility means I was more prone to injury than others my age. All the running I did in my 20’s and 30’a has led to chronic pain that makes it harder to be active now. Walking and swimming are both healthy, more sustainable options for people with bendy bodies.

As an adult in my late 40's, I’m now working with a nutritionist, an autism health and wellness  coach (Kat is perfect for this!), and a physical therapist to recover my health. I walk or swim 6-7 days a week.

No matter where we’re at physically, it’s not too late to learn to accept and live in our (sometimes complicated) bodies with more peace and less pain.

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Reach out to work with Kat LaFever!

Online everywhere | In-person in Philadelphia starting Fall 2026

Kat has over a decade of experience supporting neurodivergent adults and the parents of  neurodivergent adults. She brings a trauma-sensitive yoga certification through the Center for  Trauma and Embodiment and a holistic approach to helping people understand how their bodies  and minds work together. This fall she begins graduate study in social work in Philadelphia. She  specializes in executive functioning, self-advocacy, and navigating life transitions. Learn more at katialafever.com